Sure! Here’s a more personal and chaotic version of the article:
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So, imagine this: you get to pick any director—yeah, any director on this planet—to make an Elden Ring movie. Wild, right? You’d probably think of the usual suspects like Peter Jackson or Guillermo del Toro. I mean, they’re the fantasy kings, aren’t they? Or hey, why not Miguel Sapochnik—you know, the guy who gave us epic Game of Thrones battles like Hardhome? But then, you could also go a little left-field and pick someone like Robert Eggers or Yorgos Lanthimos. Those guys? They dive deep into the weird and surreal, which kinda matches the Elden Ring vibe if you squint hard enough.
Here’s the kicker though—I doubt anyone would think of Alex Garland for this gig. He’s the mind behind movies like Ex Machina and Annihilation, right? Oh, and those war flicks, Civil War and Warfare. But, believe it or not, the film studio A24 decided Garland’s the one to bring Hidetaka Miyazaki’s epic to the big screen. Yeah, I’m just as perplexed as you are. I mean, Garland’s no slouch. He’s writing the screenplay and directing, but I gotta wonder how he’s gonna pull this off. Seriously, what’s his game plan here?
At first glance, Garland and Elden Ring seem like an odd couple, like pickles on ice cream (trust me, don’t try it). He’s a sci-fi dude through and through. His narratives are about plot and characters, while FromSoftware does storytelling through haunting landscapes and cryptic item descriptions. Ever played Dark Souls? It’s like piecing together a broken dream. But hey, who’s to say Garland won’t surprise us? People can change, right? Like my uncle Bob who suddenly decided to go vegan after years of devouring steak.
Here’s a fun tidbit: Garland’s actually a big gamer. Yep, let that sink in. Resident Evil was part of the inspiration behind 28 Days Later, and if you saw The Beach, there’s a nod to Banjo-Kazooie. Didn’t see that coming, did you? And it gets juicier. Apparently, he loves The Last of Us, BioShock, and yes, Dark Souls. It’s not like he’s some Hollywood exec pretending to get gaming just to win fans over. Looking at you, Shyamalan. Did he even watch Avatar: The Last Airbender before making that movie?
Picture this: Garland might go all Annihilation on us, with psychedelic visuals that make your eyes pop. But what if he flips the script? What if he molds Elden Ring into something akin to Warfare? I know, crazy idea, but hear me out. Just like in Elden Ring, Warfare pushes you into tense situations where you feel outnumbered, like fighting for your life. Swap the dusty streets of Iraq with the haunting ruins of Limgrave or Caelid, and bam! You’ve got a journey where a Tarnished (that’s you) battles through the chaos to reach some sanctuary, kinda forgetting about the bigger ‘become an Elden Lord’ plot in the process. I mean, who hasn’t lost sight of a big goal while wobbling through life’s muck?
Apparently, Garland’s eyeing Kit Connor from Warfare for the lead role. Maybe this means his Elden Ring will have those suspenseful vibes, full of fear and drama. It might just echo The Last of Us series’ success because, let’s be real, understanding the essence of the game could lead to the next big hit.
Remember, Elden Ring isn’t a fanfare of power fantasies. It’s gritty and unforgiving. You’re not a superhero kicking dragon butt with style. You’re just a relentless warrior used to tasting defeat until, at last, triumph hugs you back. Garland could nail this if he embraces that bittersweet struggle. Who knows, maybe this chaotic mess will translate into something truly epic on the big screen. When Elden Ring lands in theaters, I’ll be the first in line to see if it all worked out.
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Tim Brinkhof writes about art and history. After honing his craft at NYU, he’s contributed to Vox, Vulture, Slate, Polygon, and more.
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